Episode 29: Becca Lee - How Revealing My Port-Wine Stain Changed My Life

0:07 Hello, beautiful humans. Welcome to another episode of Role Models juicy conversations with beautiful humans. I'm Jennifer Norman founder of the human Beauty movement and your host, this podcast thrives on your support. So if you like what you hear head on over to Apple podcast to rate and review us, and thank us by leaving a donation on our anchor dot f m-- page. So today's episode is all about At how liberating it is to let the real you shine through my guest today is the gorgeous. Becca Lee who goes by Becca Lee Beauty on social media. Becca has captured hearts with the power of her story, which includes adoption her unique skin, her real girl personality, and her Pro makeup Artistry skills. When Becca decided to reveal her bare skin to the world, her whole life changed and she's here to tell us all about it. Welcome Becca.

0:58 Wow, I'm so excited to be here. I can't tell you how happy I am to have you on the show, partly? Because we have something in common. You were born in Korea. I was just exhausted at 8 months old. I was adopted at 2 years old and you also have three older siblings. Who were adopted from Korea, and I actually have two other brothers and sisters on the youngest of six. But two were adopted from Vietnam so it's a whole adoption reunions. I feel like yeah, I love that. Yes, I would love to know what it was like for you growing up. What your family was like? Yeah. So I'm actually the youngest out of all my siblings as well. So, I've got a sister, and two older brothers and we're all adopted from Korea.

1:44 I grew up in a very small town, in northern Minnesota eyes. There's like eight thousand in our town at the time that I was growing up there and growing up. I definitely felt different and I think a big part of me looking back now is I don't think I recognize I felt different. The terms of Jeff's, my birthmark, but also different in the terms of like I was an Asian girl in this very predominantly white town. And so, I definitely stuck out in other ways as well. And so for me, I think my parents were very good though. Like we went every summer. There was a Korean adoptee camp that we went to every summer so we still got to learn about our culture and they made sure to include that in our lives. Like we have Korean food for special occasions and things like that. So yeah it was definitely interesting growing up. With that kind of difference to and just knowing that you look different than your parents and how that can kind of be with people growing up sometimes, you know, like people don't really understand like my for me, my parents are my parents and I just love and adore them so much. And I had such an amazing family that adopted me and that I got to grow up and be a part of that's so wonderful. You know, and I was growing up my sister and my brother who were from Vietnam were very close in age to me and my brother and I are actually eight months to the day upon From each other.

3:00 So we were in the same grade and people thought we brought men's. Okay, yeah, funny things like, I can see the resemblance and I was like, no, you can't. But okay just that, you know, monolithic Asian thing I suppose. Yeah, I yeah I and, you know, in my family we really didn't hold on to a lot of our culture. It's nice that in your family, you had those moments where you could get together and eat food. I think maybe once in a while, we would go to I grew up on Long Island and in Queens every once in In a while, we would go to these Korean fairs and have, you know, kimchi and lots of good food. And I think that, you know, something in me sparked whenever I had kimchi, because I noticed that you love red. I've got that's a bit here in my. Yeah, and my friends now but yeah, it is interesting growing up, especially in such a small town that you did being Asian and kind of feeling like, well, maybe I am different in some way but not really knowing it.

3:54 Yeah, it's like early on you just don't recognize it but something feels a myth and you're not quite sure what it is. Yeah for sure. Yeah. So like your birth and adoption story is so special. It's not the thing that you feel makes you most different. You also have a birthmark. Do you want to tell us what the skin type is that you have? Yeah, so I have port wine stain and blue Nevis or Nevis of Oda. So the port wine stain is like the red coloring that you see on my face which is actually a vascular birthmark. So basically the blood vessels in my skin have been malformed sometime during birth or not exactly sure. What causes Has it. They think it's kind of like a genetic mutation and so they're just much closer to the surface and they stay dilated and so that's what causes that render pigmentation. And then the Nevis of OTA is the blue Marquis down here on my neck and then it goes even into my eyes. And so that's just kind of a like more of a just say pigmentation discoloration I guess, okay? So since it's a birthmark, you had it since you were a baby and if yes in there.

4:55 All your life. Yes, exactly. Yeah, yeah. So I know that. You know, when you were younger, you mention about going to see the doctors and having some treatments and things like that. Can you tell us about that whole journey? Yeah, so I got treatments from the time that basically, when my parents took me home, I think I started treatment shortly thereafter and then I've got them until I was about 12 years old. My parents made, sure to try and make those experiences as positive as I could be. For me, I think a lot of misinformation is that it's just purely cosmetic. There's a lot of like actual medical Opening on having laser treatments for port wine stain especially over time because it is a vascular birthmark it can grow and change and so it can thicken and it can just cause other issues and things like that too.

5:41 So they like I said, they tried to make it as positive as an experience, they could for a child, you know, having to go into the doctor and going under anesthesia and all that. And I had amazing nurses and whatnot, and like, my dad would usually take me down. And so, like, what I look back at those times, like, there are things that I hated about it, but also, it was like a special time for me, and my dad to buy. I'm the and like we always got like a special meal afterwards and everything that's so as far as treatments overall it was like a really great experience. But I did have one experience when I was seven years old and I had gotten a new doctor, they had a new machine and the Machine was turned up too high and that guy ended up with Burns all over my face and I still have some scarring from it. So basically it blistered all over and as you can imagine that was really hard for my parents.

6:27 My mom to see and like you see me go through so much pain. And like, I had to stay home like extra days from school and whatnot. Because I had these giant blisters all over my face, and I think that was like, one of the most pivotal moments in my life and realizing how different I was. Because I did go obviously stayed out of school for a little while after that. But I did eventually go back and like I still had some of the like blisters and things and I remember being in the bathroom with another little girl and her, like, just staring at me. Like I was some sort of monster or like just like that's how I felt. Time and maybe that, you know, wasn't the case but like just remember being stared at and just really feeling so out of place and uncomfortable in my skin at that time. And so it was that the last time that you did have treatments or did you continue to have any after that? No, we're continued until I was about 12 years old and then we stopped treatments at that point because we weren't the doctors won't really see any progression with my birthmark as far as you know growths or thickening and things like that and like we weren't seeing any Difference, as far as like, my birthmark was lightning or anything like that.

7:33 And at this point, I know it's not something that would. I mean, I would probably never get it removed anyways, fully, but it's also probably just not like something realistic to have fully removed, but if such a part of me now that I wouldn't want that. Anyways? Yeah, yeah. So then of course, you know, you're a tween and then you become a teen and then I think at some point you started to experiment with makeup can you tell us about what that was like? Yeah. So in my town, we had to Schools that went into one middle school. So during Elementary School like I was very lucky in the fact that I didn't feel like I had any like major bullying issues or anything like that. Because everybody grew up with me, they knew what it was. They've seen it. It was what it was. But of course when you get to Middle School, you're adding new kids in right?

8:16 And so at that point and middle schools hard enough, the way it is. And so at that point again, I had stopped treatments and I was going into middle school and I was super self-conscious and that's when I I started to wear makeup, okay? Okay. And you were sort of using it as a mask, more than anything because of your self-consciousness. Yeah, it was definitely like my security blanket. My mask like, I would not go out without makeup on and the makeup that they made for birthmark specifically was so thick and Cakey, and just gross. So that was another reason why I like originally, when I started wearing makeup, I kind of hated it because number one I was using it at that mask number two, Thick and Cakey and I felt like I had to have it on all the time, like to the point where, if I went and had a sleepover with a friend, I would get up before everybody else and put my makeup on. Yeah, goodness and show your parents didn't have any issues with you at a younger age.

9:14 Just starting to wear makeup because they understood gotcha. I was not allowed to wear makeup until I was 16 years old. I was on the road and then it was, of course, I did. I should totally went to the bathroom and like, you know, high school and whatnot and like through on makeup. But yeah, that's that to me was like torture and unbearable because I was not comfortable with the way that I looked being Korean or just like my skin, I had terrible terrible acne when I was growing up and I just hated the way that I looked and so I was using it as a mask to in my own way, to try to, you know, just hide or turn myself into somebody that I kind of could put up with it said. Wow.

9:57 And then so afterwards interestingly enough he started to develop a knack for it because I think that when you develop this hard relationship with it, almost forced you to become a master of your own nature so to speak and say you were self-taught for a while and then you decide to go into acetic school, right? Yes, I did. Yeah. So I was definitely in the era of like, you know, when Beauty YouTube was really big and everything like that, and so that's when I started seeing and I've always been like a creative person. So that's when I started The same makeup as more than just a way to hide myself but also a way to let out a creative outlet and also I still have these memories right of like using at birthmark specific foundations and things like that.

10:38 And I'm like after watching some of these YouTube videos I'm like there has to be like a better way for me to like do my cover up makeup when I want to do it? And so I started kind of exploring that more and that's how I really got into makeup in a more like and wanting to like pursue that as my career. Yeah. So, did you do that right after high school? Nope. So I actually have my bachelor's degree, I went to a four-year College, have a degree in communication and then it was even a few years after that I kind of was getting more comfortable in my skin and in myself and realizing that I wanted to share more of my story. And so nikkietutorials, put out a power of makeup video where she did like a half face with makeup and half base without and just showing, you know, the power of makeup and what it does. And like, you know, you can embrace yourself both ways and that's the year that I decided to Prosthetic school. And that's the first time I also posted online a photo. So when I made my announcement, that I was going back to school to be an aesthetician, I posted a photo of me with half makeup on and half without and just saying, you know, I was kind of sick of hiding and sick of feeling like I had to hide and wanted to share my story.

11:45 And so, that was the first time that I put my birthmark out there on social media. And what was the reaction? It was super positive and really amazing, just even seeing like kids from high. School and stuff reach out and be like, this is so cool back on. So proud of you and, you know, just having other people that reached out and we're like, you know, I haven't seen somebody else that looks like me that has this or whatever and being able to relate to people on that, kind of level, I love that. And I want to take a pause for a moment because I don't know if it comes across as impactful as important as it should, but it should the fact that you were living with your skin in a way that caused you to not like yourself and caused you to feel Uncomfortable and W a hide. And then this one moment where you decided to do this with, so, grave.

12:34 I mean, I think and I'm going to cry. I do have, I'm gonna cry, but it takes such courage to finally be okay with ourselves. And sometimes it takes years, we get to be adults and we're still not okay with their selves. I'm still figuring this stuff out sometimes and I'm like, out really old but it's like, you know, just getting to that place where you're like, you know, I'm going to show you what I've been. Been living with. And now I'm going to be okay with myself and you're going to see more of this and I'm okay and comfortable being public about it and think of all the other people, Nick, each helped you to get to this point. But think of all the other people that are now looking to you as a role model because you were brave enough to take that step and show yourself.

13:17 And then from there it's like oh my gosh, could you have ever imagined? No no I definitely could not have Like what I get to do now and being able to have a community that like understands and appreciates me for me and like all parts of me because like that's my big thing too. You know I have a love for makeup but I also have a love for showing off my birthmark in my natural skin but I just want people to know it is okay. You can love both of those parts equally. We don't have to choose one or the other like I think that's a big thing for me and something I definitely promote. Yeah, have you ever tried to join communities where there were people with like, port wine? Stains and things like that.

13:57 Had been something that you've explored. Yeah, so actually like a few years ago I don't know why it didn't even occur to me sooner, but I was like, there has to be a Facebook group for people who have port wine stain on Facebook of other people with vascular, birthmarks and port wine stains like me and then even when I saw, when I started posting tick-tocks, I had never seen anybody with the birthmark like on my eyes like I have and all of a sudden I had a couple of people reach out. They were like five. Never seen anyone else with eyes like mine and I was like, oh my gosh, that's so cool. Like, yeah, that is so sweet. And I read somewhere where you said like earlier on, I never thought that anybody would ever want to be in a relationship with me. Like, who would want to date me.

14:41 So, can you give us an update on your relationship status? I'm married to a very handsome man. You have to like let's spill the tea like how Did this happen and tell us all about him? We're tender relationship at the beginning of our relationship because we have now been together for eight years. It's almost been and south of getting my relationship. It was when tender was new and I didn't tell anyone. I was like, yeah, we met through friends. Yeah. And I think telling him he was like the first one that I've really felt kind of comfortable just being like, straight-up honest with me. For a lot of times like, with guys, I wouldn't like, show, I wouldn't, they want to see me without makeup on, and it's your Tinder profile.

15:33 Have you in full makeup? Yeah, yeah. So then it was a reveal after yeah. Oh, yeah. And I mean, this whole revelation of me being even more comfortable in my skin. I mean, has been even just within the past few years and even our relationship and PC and me through the beginning of like, when I still wasn't really comfortable going out, like, without makeup on to like now or like, he pretty much just only Caesar you without makeup on. But yeah, I just remember it being like a little bit scary to like show him and he was obviously super cool about it and just was like, oh, it's just like part of you like whatever. You know. Oh my gosh. Well there is hope there aren't good in the world and yet. That's wonderful.

16:27 And now there's a lot of brands that are really supporting you, too. Can you tell me what it was like when you first got like a brand that was interested in sponsoring. Yeah, so actually one of the first brands that like posted me on their page like was rare Beauty. So Selena Gomez's brand which I think their messaging is just so amazing and really just aligns with me as well. And so when they reached out and were like I had to done like a lip Swatch video and they were like can we share this on our social media? I was like yeah, sure, not really thinking anything of it. Right. Because I'd been asked Before and like nothing had really come of it. And then there was a day I was with my friend at her parents house and we're having dinner and also not open my phone up and I'm like why do I have 100 notifications on my Instagram? Like this is not normal. And slowly started reaching out and it's just been a wild experience for me, getting to work with these brands. That number one, some of them.

17:33 Like, at a point I couldn't afford these Brands, I couldn't, you know, I couldn't dream of even being able to use them and now getting to, like, go on trips with them and being the face and some of their campaigns and things like that. It's been and like a very wild ride and Out of Body Experience using amazing. Yeah, I see you get a lot of Charlotte Tilbury, not just anything. You know, I bought like I was like, eh, To buy one eyeliner. And I was just kind of make sure this line wearing it right now, you know I've ever Cake Shop it like stashed very neatly but yeah I'm like it must be nice to go. These gruesome, you did an arse event and you were on it. Cosmetic, I can't believe part of the fourth Squad last year, which was such a cool opportunity to.

18:14 Yeah, so fantastic. Well L my gosh how great that you're being recognized for your uniqueness and being celebrated for it too. And that really is the whole message. Here it's about Frankly, I'd I know Society has changed because this is the time when it is, okay, and we have to stay here. Gosh, it's actually for all the craziness that's going on in the world is actually a really good time to be alive and because uniqueness is being celebrated more now than ever before, especially among Beauty companies. And so, you know, I give a big hand clap and all of that, to those companies that are really stepping up and showcasing real people, real body, real skin, real Beauty. You sure?

18:56 So do you have any advice for anybody else, who might be struggling with their own self-confidence? I actually think a big part of it for me, was taking it a little bit, so I believed it myself. I think that's part of like or like almost manifesting it, I guess if you keep telling yourself, you're confident even in situations where you don't really feel confident, you're eventually going to feel confident in my opinion. And I feel like that's what's kind of worked for me because like even still like there have been times where I was like, oh man, I Feel comfortable going out like, without makeup on. And I'm like, just do it and then I do it and I'm like, I'm fine we're good. And so for me that's been a big thing of just kind of like telling myself that I'm going to be confident and that it's going to be okay and just believing it and then it eventually kind of just happens.

19:44 Exactly. Exactly. And I like to say, you know, because it is practice, you know, you have to take that first step and the first step is always the hardest one. But once you get past that and it's like, oh, okay. Okay, and then it sinks into your knowing like you know, nothing bad is going to happen especially if you're exuding that confidence and people are like, hey I want to be like that because you know, if she can be that self-confident with herself, you know. And you know, there's no reason that I can't either and so it helps to inspire others by you just getting to that place of being. Okay? But yeah, it is that moment where you're jumping off the cliff a little bit. Yeah, I'm sure.

20:25 Becca. I want to thank you so much for being on Role Models today. You're an absolute treasure. I'll put all of your information in the show notes and everybody knows where to find you. Please follow Becca. Lee, Beauty everywhere on social media. Thank you so much. Thank you.